So Many

So many of you have asked me where I'm meeting these charming men and I have answered honestly since Day One: Online. Now, not all of them have been online daters (far fewer have actually been charmers) but for the most part, that's the pool I'm catching them from. There are so many choices when it comes to online dating though, how is a girl to choose? Well there are a few rules to consider.

A) It's who you know...

--- I want you to know that I paid for eHarmony for over a year (which started as a Christmas gift from my mother --- thanks Mom!!!) and the only person I got off of that site was "date rape" guy. Please see previous entry for details. This is not to say that it's a bad site. I was at a wedding merely two weeks ago where the couple met on eHarmony and are now back from their honeymoon, happily enjoying their new home. From what I understand, he had been dating girls from there for several months. He was the first guy she met. Lucky bitch! (Just kidding, love you!) I did not have the same fortunate experience as they did so I have since moved on.

---Another beautiful girlfriend of mine got married last month to a man she met on Yahoo personals. To be clear, she did not actually sign up for the site. Her mother signed her up because she thought her daughter needed a boyfriend. The mom wrote back to many guys before thinking that she'd found the one. That's when she broke the news to my friend but only because she was sure that this guy was worth getting to know better. They moved in together after 10 months, adopted a puppy and are living the fairy tale ending we all dream of since girlhood. Again, lucky bitch! (Love you to pieces, you're my hero!)

***Note to the reader: Yahoo personals is now Match.com in case you're looking***

---My cousin (the lawyer) is incredibly smart, stubborn and picky (in a good way.) She met her husband on JPeople. This is like JDate except cheaper so you know it's for certain kinds of Jewish guys only. They are both very successful in their careers and stand by each other through ups and downs like you would not believe. Their bond is so strong that I cannot help but admire them for their conviction and outright love for each other. She wouldn't mind at all if I called her a lucky bitch, cause I think she knows she is one!!!

B) If it's free, it's for me...

---PlentyOfFish is a great site if you have all the time in the world on your hands and don't mind scouring through thousands of profiles to find someone worthy of so much as a hello. I have scored a few good finds here although for the most part, they've been throw backs. Just about every guy who uses phrases like "hit me up," "where my ladiez at?" and "chillin wit my homeboyz" has come from POF. A plethora of shirtless photos have been uploaded to this site (not that I'm complaining, mind you.) Again, it's not all bad. I have a girlfriend with the most stunning features you've ever seen on a woman. She is the definition of a dark haired beauty. We walk into a bar or a club and you can just see men's eyes turn to her. She's smart, funny, confident and could not find a man she was truly happy to stay with. She met her latest beau on plentyoffish and he's fantastic. Such a sweet, wonderful guy who makes her smile and treats her like a princess. They're looking at apartments together right now and I am keeping my fingers crossed for her. She would actually call herself a lucky bitch at this point!

---OkCupid. Ah, my longtime love affair. I have nothing bad to say about you except that I wish you'd stop "matching" me with my ex'es! I mean, I guess the science behind the romance knows just who I'd go for so they must be on to something but honestly, the next time an ex winds up in my inbox, I might have to scream! It's nerve-racking enough knowing that your ex'es are out there dating but please don't rub it in my face. (Like you could stop yourself from looking at a profile either...) Now, okc was recommended to me by a very dear friend of mine and although she hasn't found anyone for herself on the site, it has been the most fruitful for me. There seems to be a different caliber of men on here, a different class of non-loser that makes me hopeful and optimistic for the future of dating. Most guys at least appear normal in their profiles and have optimally clothed pictures. They list hobbies and employment and whether they like cats or dogs. They tell you about their interests and travel and education and what movies / tv shows / music they enjoy. Most of the time, they're funny, witty and use spelling & grammar properly. Which is why when the invitation came to have drinks in the city with other NY area OkCupid users and the staff, I knew I was headed into Manhattan for a good time...

C) The other guys...

---Because I know you're morbidly curious, the other sites that I'm registered on are match, chemistry, yahoo, eHarmony, okcupid, plentyoffish, spark, jpeople, christianmingle, wealthymen, sugardaddie, alikewise (for bookworms) and howaboutwe. If you have a dating website that I'm not listed under, please contact me and I'll sign up right away! Gotta cast that net wide...

Copyright Kimberly Spice 2010