Thursday, May 20, 2010

34 / 43

His profile says he's 34. He seems really nice, smart, moderately funny and perfectly acceptable looking. Owns his own home, drives a nice car, has a steady job. We start chatting via the website, then through text and then finally, on the phone. Turns out that we've got birthdays the same week, so we decide that when we meet up, it'll be a quasi-celebration of both of us turning a year older. Me, 29 and him, 35.

But wait, what's that you say? You're turning 44??? How can that be? Your profile says you're 34. A decade is not a small difference. "Well, when I wrote that, I mixed up the numbers. I wrote 3-4 instead of 4-3. And since I look pretty young, no one's questioned it. But yeah, I'm 44."

And this is the moment I realize what men really want. They want to be dating a 20 something. 20 year old men want to date 20 year old women. 30 year old men want to date 20 year old women. And 40 year old men want to date 20 year old women. So basically, once you're out of college, you're screwed. Past 25, you are actually too old for anyone to date, over 30, good luck and over 40, just forget it. Which means I have one more year left to market myself as a 20-something before I am officially labelled as too old to be dateable and may wander around the planet single for the rest of my days.

Funny, since I just rejected a 20 year old...

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